A big "SCREW YOU" to anyone who still...STILL...thinks ADHD isn't real. Is it over diagnosis, probably, do some parents use it as an excuse for their shitty parenting, you bet. But my son has an actual diagnosis, from actual medical professionals.
We spoke with our family doctor about some issues he was having at school. Did his teacher bring it to our attention, yup. But she spends hours every day with him so of course she would mention it to us. It wasn't "your son is a bad kid he needs meds" it was "he's having some troubles in class, you may want to bring them up with his doctor next time he goes." None of these issues were a surprise to us, we were noticing them at home.
Luckily, he had a well-child check up not too long after that so we spoke with his doctor. The doctor (whom we feel is a GREAT doctor) felt we should see someone in the Behavioural Health Department at the local children's hospital...and I'm glad we did!
After over 4 hours of testing, interviews with his teacher at the time, interviews with us...he was diagnosed with ADHD/combined type. That means he has the inattentive and hyperactive types. He was almost diagnosed on the Autisim Spectrum but, in the doctors words, "he is WAY too sociable"
Yeah, not really sure why that exclueded him as I know some very sociable autistic people but so be it.
Oh, and he is HIGHLY inteligent. Reads and does math 2 grade levels above his actual grade level (yeah, he went up that extra half a grade level since the last post). Scored in the 99.9 percentile in the visual/spacial reasoning portion of the test. Oh, and they want the test repeated in 18-24 months after the initial test. Why? Because they think the current number it low due to his ADHD and impaired fine motor skills.
So I didn't go to our doctor and tell them he refused to sit still and focus and insisted he needed meds. Trust me, the last thing I wanted to do was put him on another medication (he already takes one for his asthma and another for his reflux) but they help him. He gets the lowest dose and we go up by very small amounts. We have incorporated non-medical things (social skills group therapy, "fidgets", positive reinforcement, etc) with small success.
He isn't a bad kid, he isn't a kid who can sit still for hours at a time (especially without something to do), and he sure as hell isn't being a brat! Don't give me a look because I don't yell at him for "acting out", he shuts down with loud noises so talking to him softly is the best way to handle dicipline with him. And he's my kid, worry about your own life!
It was a long road to get the correct diagnosis for him. Yes, I'm frustrated at the end of the day with him...I'm also mentally exhausted and have very little patience left. Want to spend a day in my life? Want to answer a million questions and hear a million stories that make no sence to you but are told with such passion that you want to understand them? Want to constantly be on alert to make sure your son doesn't hurt himself because he doesn't remember he needs to think before he does and says something? Oh, and don't forget that you still have another child who has her own special needs.
I want to get my son a t-shirt I saw, it says "Spend a day in my brain before you say I don't need meds" Truer words have rarely been spoken.
So for those doctors and parents who over-diagnosis and use the diagnosis as an excuse...thanks for making it harder on those of us who are dealing with an actual diagnosis and trying to raise our ADHD kids to not blame their disease on being a brat. Jerks.
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